The rest of the story
May. 1st, 2007 07:35 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
teleribWhew.
So at about 2am on Saturday, I got up and felt my water break. At least, I figured that's what it must be. All I was hoping for as I rushed into the bathroom was that it wasn't a funny color like red or green. Hurrah, it wasn't.
I woke Moe up and he called the hospital as I cleaned up. The midwife from the group who was on call - the only one I hadn't liked, of course! - looked at my recent high blood pressure and my term (36 weeks and 2 days) and said to come on in. We had time to pack - I'd gotten the labor bag together, but the recovery bag was on Saturday's to-do list.
In one of the best coincidences in my life to date, my dad had come down this weekend to help get nursery stuff together. We called him at the hotel and he came over, too. We called our doula, Nancy, who was surprised to hear from us - she recommended we get to the hospital and call her either when early labor was over or they started the Pitocin. All three of us headed to Howard County General. Contractions started en route - not very strong, not very regular.
We checked in at about 4am. They put me on monitoring and declared that I would be in bed, preferrably on my left side, for all of labor, because of my high blood pressure. The possibility of an epidural was floated and even recommended, but no one was in a rush. They didn't do an exam because of the waters having broken and me being early, and they left us all to nap and to see if my contractions would strengthen and regularize on their own.
At around 7am (and the times in the narrative will get fuzzy from here on out), there wasn't much progress in the contractions, so they hooked me up with some Pitocin. We called Nancy after some debate. What with everyone saying "epidural" and me not being able to move much to call on Nancy's bag of doula tricks, I wasn't sure if it was still a good idea. Moe wanted her there, and I agreed. Moe was so right. Also at around 7, they had a shift change and midwife Kay came on duty. I think I'd only met Kay once, but she wasn't the Other One, so great! The head nurse coming on, Derinda, knew our doula Nancy (Nancy used to work as an RN at Howard County) and was glad she'd be there.
When Nancy got there, even she said, "Maybe epidural." Mind you, I wasn't dead-set against epidurals or other pain meds. In fact, I kinda figured I'd eventually want one. Contractions started to get more intense around 8:30 or so; I think around 9 they finally did an exam.
I was already 5-6 cm dilated and 100% effaced, and the baby was at "station 0," his head just about ready to go through the pelvis. In other words - better than halfway done!
But at about this time, I was beginning to think that hours and hours more of this was really just not necessary, and we started getting ready for the Epidural Man.
Moe and my dad were there and being great. My dad always impresses health care workers with his bedside manner - the hospice nurses tried to recruit him for hospice when they saw him taking care of Mom. He and Nancy kept up a steady stream of encouragement and advice. Moe, feeling I think a little lost, said a lot less, but stayed right with me and gave me ice chips, fanned me, and held my hand.
(It was possible very wise - there was one time he did try to chime in with a "Breathe!" and his tone, which was a little too commanding for my taste at the time, nearly led me to snap at him. I refrained.)
They wanted to do one more exam before they gave me the epidural, and somewhere around 10:30am I was 8cm dilated! It's more usual to dilate at around 1cm/hr, so I was progressive very quickly. With Nancy and Kay's encouragement, we decided to hold off on the epidural. (Although after the next contraction, I joked that I wanted the "epidural fairy" again.)
Time is really fuzzy around here, because I also thought 10:30 was the exam where they told me I could start pushing. There was a little lip of cervix left, but my contractions had changed from painful to "urge to push," to the point where I was pushing with my hands on the bedrails, just to push something. They let me do that for a while, then made me stop and put me on oxygen - the baby's heartrate had dropped. He recovered, and they let me push some more. I asked what time it was after what seemed like forever and was told 11:20. (I had my glasses off and was preferring to keep my eyes closed.)
Then the baby's heartrate dropped again - 80 beats per minute when the folks in the room were hoping for at least 100. Ellen, another nurse, came in and started drill sergeant-ing. (As Nancy explained later, she hadn't seen the time history of the labor - just came in, saw "baby in distress" signs, and started barking orders. Not on her watch.) "We need to get this baby out" was the common refrain, and I was wondering if, after all this damn pushing, they were going to C-section me anyway.
The student nurse later told me that Kay, the midwife, had "magic hands." She apparently sat down, did some sort of manipulation with her hands, and when I next pushed, Maurice practically jumped out at 12:09pm. They plopped him on my stomach (draped? must've been) briefly. He started crying right away and the NICU staff in the room swooped down to see to him. Nancy reassured me that they were all laughing, which was an excellent sign.
There was some work still to be done on me - Maurice was in such a rush he didn't turn sideways before he came out, and I had a fairly major tear. (They tell me it's "level 3.") So they stitched me up.
Then the unpleasant news. Maurice had stopped crying and was making rhythmic little grunting noises, which I thought were cute - but they were a sign of under-developed premie lungs. So they were taking him to the NICU. I got them to hold him where I could see him, and we blearily regarded each other for a minute before they took him away. But he had pinked right up and otherwise seemed large and healthy, so - no panicking.
Saturday was a muzzy, fuzzy, tired day in bed, where I alternated between being jealous of the crying babies in the Maternal Child Unit ("I want my baby") and feeling vaguely unsure if there had been a baby at all. In the evening, they took us down to the NICU to see Maurice. He was on a CPAP - just like his dad! - to help with his breathing, and he was still grunting (which, under the CPAP, sounded much less cute and more like pathetic whimpers). We got to touch and stroke him a little, and then - to bed.
Sunday was "no touch the baby day" - the day nurse felt that touching him got him too worked up and increased his respiration, which they were trying to slow down. But we visited. Maurice came off the CPAP during the day and was on a nasal cana... I want to call it the "nasal canal" but that's not it. They were just blowing air up his nose - it's one step away from unassisted breathing. Without his very funky CPAP hat, I finally saw the hair everyone was talking about. Oh my goodness. He has a ton of long, dark hair.
I started breast pumping and walking my bottles down to NICU - after more solid sleep than I'd had in months, and with 600mg of ibuprofin keeping the soreness away, I was feeling great. During one drop-off, he was awake and looked at me, which was absolutely wonderful. Dad came back to see the baby before he had to go back to NJ, and Moe's parents arrived that night.
The night nurse lifted the "no touch" moratorium. There was talk that, if his breathing slowed down, I might feed him Monday. During another milk run, I saw him getting his first bath, which was of course an Assault on Human Dignity. Kid didn't know how good he had it - the nurse was quick and efficient but gentle. Maurice, your parents are going to fumble it a lot more for the first months.
Monday, he continued to improve, coming off of the 'nasal canal' and breathing on his own, but still too rapidly for feeding. (There's a risk he'd inhale his food, and food in lungs is bad.) At our visit last night, they finally let us hold him - carefully, since he's still on an IV for nourisment and medicines. He's got a touch of the jaundice, but not so bad that they've put him under a lamp yet.
Today, we call at 10am to see if they'll let me feed him today. If so, hurrah! If not, we'll go to visit again anyway. Moe's parents are still here - his mom was a phenomenon yesterday, cleaning things up, and she's going to finish a few things today.
To all the well-wishes and offers of help: Thank you so much! We are trying to get a handle on what needs to get done, and trust me, we will take people up on those offers when we have a "to do" list. My blood pressure is still up, so I'm supposed to be resting, which I'm trying to do but it's bloody annoying. I feel better and I want to be doing things. But, Spud needs a healthy mama, so I'm trying to rest as much as possible for the next week or so.
It was, overall, a very good experience. The Howard County staff were all wonderful. Even the early birth may have been a blessing - if my blood pressure had kept going up, it might have been a harder birth for me and for Spud down the road. For all that there were worrisome things that happened, I never felt afraid or (worst of all in a medical situation) abandoned or ignored and afraid. (After the Abigail Experience, that was my major concern for this birth.) Nancy was a lifesaver, I was absolutely blessed that my dad could be there, Moe was as strong as I needed him to be, and little Maurice will be home soon.
So at about 2am on Saturday, I got up and felt my water break. At least, I figured that's what it must be. All I was hoping for as I rushed into the bathroom was that it wasn't a funny color like red or green. Hurrah, it wasn't.
I woke Moe up and he called the hospital as I cleaned up. The midwife from the group who was on call - the only one I hadn't liked, of course! - looked at my recent high blood pressure and my term (36 weeks and 2 days) and said to come on in. We had time to pack - I'd gotten the labor bag together, but the recovery bag was on Saturday's to-do list.
In one of the best coincidences in my life to date, my dad had come down this weekend to help get nursery stuff together. We called him at the hotel and he came over, too. We called our doula, Nancy, who was surprised to hear from us - she recommended we get to the hospital and call her either when early labor was over or they started the Pitocin. All three of us headed to Howard County General. Contractions started en route - not very strong, not very regular.
We checked in at about 4am. They put me on monitoring and declared that I would be in bed, preferrably on my left side, for all of labor, because of my high blood pressure. The possibility of an epidural was floated and even recommended, but no one was in a rush. They didn't do an exam because of the waters having broken and me being early, and they left us all to nap and to see if my contractions would strengthen and regularize on their own.
At around 7am (and the times in the narrative will get fuzzy from here on out), there wasn't much progress in the contractions, so they hooked me up with some Pitocin. We called Nancy after some debate. What with everyone saying "epidural" and me not being able to move much to call on Nancy's bag of doula tricks, I wasn't sure if it was still a good idea. Moe wanted her there, and I agreed. Moe was so right. Also at around 7, they had a shift change and midwife Kay came on duty. I think I'd only met Kay once, but she wasn't the Other One, so great! The head nurse coming on, Derinda, knew our doula Nancy (Nancy used to work as an RN at Howard County) and was glad she'd be there.
When Nancy got there, even she said, "Maybe epidural." Mind you, I wasn't dead-set against epidurals or other pain meds. In fact, I kinda figured I'd eventually want one. Contractions started to get more intense around 8:30 or so; I think around 9 they finally did an exam.
I was already 5-6 cm dilated and 100% effaced, and the baby was at "station 0," his head just about ready to go through the pelvis. In other words - better than halfway done!
But at about this time, I was beginning to think that hours and hours more of this was really just not necessary, and we started getting ready for the Epidural Man.
Moe and my dad were there and being great. My dad always impresses health care workers with his bedside manner - the hospice nurses tried to recruit him for hospice when they saw him taking care of Mom. He and Nancy kept up a steady stream of encouragement and advice. Moe, feeling I think a little lost, said a lot less, but stayed right with me and gave me ice chips, fanned me, and held my hand.
(It was possible very wise - there was one time he did try to chime in with a "Breathe!" and his tone, which was a little too commanding for my taste at the time, nearly led me to snap at him. I refrained.)
They wanted to do one more exam before they gave me the epidural, and somewhere around 10:30am I was 8cm dilated! It's more usual to dilate at around 1cm/hr, so I was progressive very quickly. With Nancy and Kay's encouragement, we decided to hold off on the epidural. (Although after the next contraction, I joked that I wanted the "epidural fairy" again.)
Time is really fuzzy around here, because I also thought 10:30 was the exam where they told me I could start pushing. There was a little lip of cervix left, but my contractions had changed from painful to "urge to push," to the point where I was pushing with my hands on the bedrails, just to push something. They let me do that for a while, then made me stop and put me on oxygen - the baby's heartrate had dropped. He recovered, and they let me push some more. I asked what time it was after what seemed like forever and was told 11:20. (I had my glasses off and was preferring to keep my eyes closed.)
Then the baby's heartrate dropped again - 80 beats per minute when the folks in the room were hoping for at least 100. Ellen, another nurse, came in and started drill sergeant-ing. (As Nancy explained later, she hadn't seen the time history of the labor - just came in, saw "baby in distress" signs, and started barking orders. Not on her watch.) "We need to get this baby out" was the common refrain, and I was wondering if, after all this damn pushing, they were going to C-section me anyway.
The student nurse later told me that Kay, the midwife, had "magic hands." She apparently sat down, did some sort of manipulation with her hands, and when I next pushed, Maurice practically jumped out at 12:09pm. They plopped him on my stomach (draped? must've been) briefly. He started crying right away and the NICU staff in the room swooped down to see to him. Nancy reassured me that they were all laughing, which was an excellent sign.
There was some work still to be done on me - Maurice was in such a rush he didn't turn sideways before he came out, and I had a fairly major tear. (They tell me it's "level 3.") So they stitched me up.
Then the unpleasant news. Maurice had stopped crying and was making rhythmic little grunting noises, which I thought were cute - but they were a sign of under-developed premie lungs. So they were taking him to the NICU. I got them to hold him where I could see him, and we blearily regarded each other for a minute before they took him away. But he had pinked right up and otherwise seemed large and healthy, so - no panicking.
Saturday was a muzzy, fuzzy, tired day in bed, where I alternated between being jealous of the crying babies in the Maternal Child Unit ("I want my baby") and feeling vaguely unsure if there had been a baby at all. In the evening, they took us down to the NICU to see Maurice. He was on a CPAP - just like his dad! - to help with his breathing, and he was still grunting (which, under the CPAP, sounded much less cute and more like pathetic whimpers). We got to touch and stroke him a little, and then - to bed.
Sunday was "no touch the baby day" - the day nurse felt that touching him got him too worked up and increased his respiration, which they were trying to slow down. But we visited. Maurice came off the CPAP during the day and was on a nasal cana... I want to call it the "nasal canal" but that's not it. They were just blowing air up his nose - it's one step away from unassisted breathing. Without his very funky CPAP hat, I finally saw the hair everyone was talking about. Oh my goodness. He has a ton of long, dark hair.
I started breast pumping and walking my bottles down to NICU - after more solid sleep than I'd had in months, and with 600mg of ibuprofin keeping the soreness away, I was feeling great. During one drop-off, he was awake and looked at me, which was absolutely wonderful. Dad came back to see the baby before he had to go back to NJ, and Moe's parents arrived that night.
The night nurse lifted the "no touch" moratorium. There was talk that, if his breathing slowed down, I might feed him Monday. During another milk run, I saw him getting his first bath, which was of course an Assault on Human Dignity. Kid didn't know how good he had it - the nurse was quick and efficient but gentle. Maurice, your parents are going to fumble it a lot more for the first months.
Monday, he continued to improve, coming off of the 'nasal canal' and breathing on his own, but still too rapidly for feeding. (There's a risk he'd inhale his food, and food in lungs is bad.) At our visit last night, they finally let us hold him - carefully, since he's still on an IV for nourisment and medicines. He's got a touch of the jaundice, but not so bad that they've put him under a lamp yet.
Today, we call at 10am to see if they'll let me feed him today. If so, hurrah! If not, we'll go to visit again anyway. Moe's parents are still here - his mom was a phenomenon yesterday, cleaning things up, and she's going to finish a few things today.
To all the well-wishes and offers of help: Thank you so much! We are trying to get a handle on what needs to get done, and trust me, we will take people up on those offers when we have a "to do" list. My blood pressure is still up, so I'm supposed to be resting, which I'm trying to do but it's bloody annoying. I feel better and I want to be doing things. But, Spud needs a healthy mama, so I'm trying to rest as much as possible for the next week or so.
It was, overall, a very good experience. The Howard County staff were all wonderful. Even the early birth may have been a blessing - if my blood pressure had kept going up, it might have been a harder birth for me and for Spud down the road. For all that there were worrisome things that happened, I never felt afraid or (worst of all in a medical situation) abandoned or ignored and afraid. (After the Abigail Experience, that was my major concern for this birth.) Nancy was a lifesaver, I was absolutely blessed that my dad could be there, Moe was as strong as I needed him to be, and little Maurice will be home soon.
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no subject
Date: 2007-05-01 02:10 pm (UTC)Incidentally, the device you're almost certainly thinking of is a nasal cannula.
no subject
Date: 2007-05-02 01:00 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-05-01 02:41 pm (UTC)It's great that your milk is already in! Are they going to let you actually try to nurse, or does he need to start off with syringe feeding?
Oh, and to little Maurice: Breathe! Breathe! Breathe! Good boy.
no subject
Date: 2007-05-02 01:06 pm (UTC)They will let me nurse eventually, but they've started with bottle-feeding him my pumped milk. I've gotten to do two of the feedings myself - and the second one he tossed right back up at me. :)
It's the first departure from Canonical Modern Birth Thinking that I've seen there, but the LCs think the latest research shows that, while nipple confusion is real, it's sufficiently rare that the bottles are OK. Chances are, he's going to be there long enough that they will start letting me nurse him, and there's a LC just for the NICU available for as much help as I'll need.
no subject
Date: 2007-05-01 03:13 pm (UTC)I hope the little guy gets stronger every day so that he can come home soon! Sounds as if he has some happy and helpful grandparents, too. :-)
no subject
Date: 2007-05-02 01:07 pm (UTC)What's your favorite dish?
Date: 2007-05-01 09:23 pm (UTC)Also, Mamma and Daddy have to eat too. Want me to bring you supper sometime?
Re: What's your favorite dish?
Date: 2007-05-02 01:11 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-05-02 05:22 pm (UTC)*hugs* Congrats !
no subject
Date: 2007-05-03 03:07 am (UTC)Congrats
Date: 2007-05-04 12:56 pm (UTC)Barb & Tiny